Are you getting married, and have children? Why not include
your children (or child) in the celebration that will join your blended family together.
Weddings offer a number of ways to
include the whole family. There is the
ceremony itself, adding special reception moments, and during the planning
process as a whole.
Here are 5 ways you can include everyone in the wedding:
Planning
- Your (or your partner’s) kid(s) can help with many of the planning pieces: from picking the wedding colors and theme, to tasting cake and the wedding meal. The wedding vendor meetings can be a great bonding activity for everyone involved. Bring the kiddos to the fun and appropriate meetings. I would avoid bringing children to any meeting that is just talking and likely to be boring for them. The photographer or wedding planner meetings might be prime examples. Keep the children involved in the parts they care about and are fun. The wedding becomes a shared event that is important to all when children’s’ opinions are included.
- A great unifying piece is sending a ‘Family Wedding Invitation’. There are many options on wording to include both the couple and children’s names. Check with your invitation company for options and examples.
Ceremony
- If a family ceremony is less traditional
or more then you are looking for, you can include one or two of the
elements. Choose from any of these:
Walk down the aisle together, include the children in your wedding party,
have them read a poem, recite their own vows, or be included in yours,
family unity ceremony with a candle or sand, etc.
- Family ceremony: This wedding is about more than joining the two of you. It is now about joining a family. You can talk to your Officiant and opt to have a family oriented ceremony. They can provide suggestions on how to best do this in your situation. These ceremonies are centered on not just the joining of a couple, but instead the creation of a new family. All of the traditional aspects of the wedding are transformed to include all members of the new union. Note: Depending on the age of the children, they may not be able to stand at the altar during the entire ceremony with you, or be able to recite a poem, so finding the right fit for your participants is important.
Reception
- The reception is generally more than 60% of the wedding day. If you want to continue to share the spotlight here are a few ideas: create a ‘Family Table’ in your seating arrangements, where the entire family can sit together during dinner, and guests can come by and congratulate everyone, not just the bride and groom. Special Dances: Include your children (or child) in a special family dance, in additional to any traditional dances you may be doing, ie. father/daughter dance, or mother/son dance. There are a number of songs, out there that can really capture the relationship between Father/Daughter and of course Mother/Son songs.
If you are about to blend your family; including your
children (or child) is a great way to allow them to be a part of the commitment
that you are about to make to your new husband or wife. Because in the end they
are joining the commitment as well.
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